Years ago from the age of about 16 to 50 I wore make up anytime I went out for an evening. If I was out somewhere and noticed that a female performer was not wearing make up or dressed up somewhat I would wonder what she was thinking. “Oh man,” I thought, “How can you do that? Did you not look in the mirror before you left home? People are there to watch you perform so at least you could put in an effort to be more presentable!” Yes I was judgemental and it wasn’t because she didn’t look good. She really did look just fine but in my mind I thought it was disrespectful to the audience if you didn’t dress up. I believe my attitude stems from younger years full of negative body image and always worried about what people thought of me. It was a learned behaviour and how I felt about myself made me very jealous and hateful towards other women sometimes. If I could find fault with them I would. I was the one with the problem not the performer!
It wasn’t until years later when I was in my 50’s that I started feeling comfortable about who I was, how I looked and now I am 57 and rarely wear make up and could care less what people think about it. Still from time to time I make the effort especially when you have a friend that sells it.
Last night I went to my friend’s open house for Mary Kay make up. I use to wear Mary Kay when I was in my early 20’s and I liked it back then. I probably used it for about five years. I just got out of the habit of putting on the skin care products and eventually got out of touch with my Mary Kay representative. Now like I said, I rarely wear make up but sometimes you have to support what your friend does because she does many things for you. It had been a while since I used moisturizer on a regular basis and last time I wanted to wear make up for a night out I couldn’t find the mascara. Yes it had been that long!
My friend, she has such enthusiasm and belief in her products. She is a real professional sales lady. She wears her make up all the time. I have never seen her without it. She had her home all beautifully decorated for Christmas and Mary Kay make up displayed perfectly. This was a night for people to just drop in so there were two other ladies there at the same time I was. The one lady had her make up on, dressed nicely and she looked stunning. She loved her Mary Kay! What beautiful skin she had! She wore her skin care regiment regularly, you could tell. The other client that was there had no make up on and longer hair like me.
It kind of hit me like a brick that you can really tell when people take care of themselves and when they don’t. It’s okay to be comfortable in your own skin, not wear make up but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t look after your skin. With that in mind I am going to try to remember to use this new moisturizer I just bought morning and night. I mean, really, no amount of moisturizer is going to fix the stress and crap this face has gone through but I know I have neglected my skin because of my way of thinking. I went from the extreme of criticizing women for not wearing make to the extreme of really not caring how I looked at all.
I still won’t worry about wearing make up and I still won’t cut my hair short just because I’m over 50 and people think I should, but I definitely want to have nicer skin. My face looks like I might have had a mini stroke or something. Even though my eyelids are droopy, one more than the other, my mouth is lower on one side and I have jowls that only surgery could fix I am going to make an attempt to use this moisturizer daily. Today, the very first day my skin feels much nicer. Thank you Mary Kay and friend!
I’m Frazzled Again.