We are all hounded by the marketing geniuses, forever seeing commercials on TV for the need to leave enough money for your loved ones to bury you and enough so they are taken care of. They’ve even started including the guilt trip to leave your grandchildren money.
Twenty years ago when my husband and I bought life insurance, his kids were still in high school. We included them in the will so they would have a bit of inheritance. We are not rich by any means. We were barely buying enough insurance to bury us and pay off our bills with a little left over, assuming that we weren’t going to die at the same time.
Over the last twenty years of course, we ran up a lot of debt, mostly because of my failed businesses so it was time to take another look at the will. In the last fifteen years my husband’s children have gotten married, had children and paid off their mortgages. I never had children of my own but got along fine with his kids. They lived out of province so we didn’t get to see a lot of them but we do have a special bond with the grandchildren.
We decided that the kids or grandchildren didn’t need to receive an inheritance from our pittance of a will when they were making way more money than us, had more luxuries than us and the childrens college fund was full. We, on the other hand, are not so well off as we still have a rather large mortgage, most of our other bills are paid for, and my pension is going to be very small. We are both self-employed so there is no guaranteed income. We are changing our will to go completely to the surviving spouse. It makes sense.
A few months ago, I was talking with my step-son, just having a general conversation about retirement etc. Out of the blue my step-son says, “Oh don’t worry, we have dad taken care of. We have the perfect plan set up.” “Oh, well that’s great!” I said, pretending to be happy for my husband. In the meantime, I am thinking, “Okay, I guess they assume I’m going to die first and if his dad dies first they aren’t too worried about what is going to happen to me.”
Is that normal? I’ve been married to their dad for 25 years. We’ve not had any real issues, the grandchildren call me grandma. I’m glad we are changing the will now that I know their way of thinking, but I never would have suggested to my husband to write them out of the will if he didn’t want to. It was his idea. Truth hurts sometimes.
Happy spending everyone,
I’m Frazzled Again!